#TVD 8×14 {#ItsBeenaHellofaRide}

Recap by Jaye

“One less bell to answer
One less soul to fry
One less fool to pick up after
I should be happy
But all I can do is vomit”

He’s dead–the devil that is. Imploded in a manner most satisfying. Struck through the heart he was by Stefan I’m only human Salvatore. Does the devil even have a heart? But, hold up. There’s a new devil a’comin’. Intended for coronation is HRL (Her Royal Lowness) Katherine Pierce–the baddest, meanest biotch of them all will ascend. Is she really? Wow who knew.

Exactly how the devil did we get to this point in this series? Actually why? Why are we here? Rhetorical questions of course, because we all have theories. In the end, this convoluted, unintelligible yarn defines these writers as ones with atrophied brains. It happens when folks sit on their brains for too long.

For all practical purposes this episode was the season and series finale. Stefan killed Cade. Damon sacrificed himself for his bro and his ‘ho–all in the name of luv. All indication is that Stefan proposed to Caroline in the name of comfort and convenience. I don’t know since I FF their scenes. Kai is in hell as am I at this point. He’ll sing ‘Knock, knock, knocking at heaven’s door’ and I’ll sing ‘Stairway to heaven’–we probably will harmonize now and again.
All that’s left is the epilogue or the rounding up or swan song moments for the ‘major’ actors we met when the series began. I say ‘actors’ because they ceased being characters that I can identify, or recognize or in fact characters I want to confess I knew. I’m saddened by that. And it’s not that I am disturbed or angry about who will end up with whom. I have long ago ceased to care about that. I suppose I should thank the writers for hardening my heart as it were.

The episode, nonetheless, was laden with activity. But aside from the clear rip-off homage to BtVS’s ‘Chosen’ episode [where Spike sacrificed himself for the woman he loved and to save the ‘world’]; the episode was hollow but heavy handed in it’s attempt to carve out mysterious twists and spin doctor. Quantity doesn’t ace quality. It failed at clarity and cleverness as well, simply because there was no logic or cohesiveness or consistency to the action. Damon’s dead…but wait, he’s not. Cade dead…but wait hell remains. Didn’t they say hell would go to hell with Cade dead? Katherine is hell queen and mean. Katherine (at least the Katherine whose persona they painstakingly carved out for three seasons) is reckless and selfish and narcissistic. She is manipulative absolutely, but she has shown she has a capacity to love. I suppose she could have changed, what with being in hell and all.

” We’re toast”–Damon’s sentiment about what the impact of Katherine being the devil supreme will be. Well Damon here’s hoping you’ll be well toasted. I suppose the plan is to kill Katherine? And then what? Will there be someone else to take her place? Maybe what should happen is that Katherine takes everyone to hell. Now, that would be a hell of a ride.

Two to go..