Since we’re so close to the end, how about another take on the penultimate episode? This second recap is by Jaye.
This episode, much like the sixty odd ones before made me itchy. Along with the scowl and indigestion I get from watching this shell of a series, I wondered what I could have been doing these past three years with the hours I logged watching this damn show. I mean these were moments to say…watch grass grow or watch paint dry for instance. If I was gonna waste time, why not do it during circumstances that were benign? That wouldn’t make me itchy or bitchy or whiny? That wouldn’t make me think or wonder about the nonsensical writing choices, or (like this episode) directorial and logical inconsistencies. The writers have clearly given up on the show or are using the audience as some sort of guinea pigs for a psychological Pavlov dog like experiment somehow. I watch with a perverse sense of obligation I suppose. For me there is an odd dichotomy between waiting for the end and not giving a rat’s ass about it. I surmise that what I won’t get is proper closure and then I realize that it doesn’t matter what the closure would be. So, what’s this episode’s big news? They’re getting married–Steroline that is–ding dong the bells are gonna chime!
Enter Damon–the butterfly, the wedding planner, preacher, flowergirl, DJ, master of ceremonies, best man, orchestrator and philosopher. He’s the master of manipulation and main puppeteer. Stefan and Caroline moved up their wedding day because Damon said so. He reflected that Katherine had a hand in the key moments of all their lives and that having a shot gun wedding would guarantee Katherine would appear to stop Stefan’s marriage to her sire. And then…it’d be on. They’d get her bones make a dagger and kill her. Badda bing, badda boom. But doesn’t Katherine always have a Plan B?
Stefan and Caroline’s cluster of a wedding happened. It’s no secret that I cannot stand this pairing and seeing the supposedly ‘epic’ faces with the ‘epic’ look of love after the ‘epic’ vows was epic-ally cringe worthy. Caroline did look nice in her gown and the twins were very cute. Meanwhile Caroline’s something old and borrowed was, of course Damon and Stefan respectively…okay, I kid. But, her actual old and borrowed were Katherine’s necklace and Rebekah’s talisman! Seriously? This along with the compelled guests and wedding toasts made the forty minute show seemed like an eternity in hell.
Enzo and Bonnie had one last dance in their love submarine. Awww. I must say the one thing about Enzo this is rather nice is that he actually put Bonnie’s needs first. That said, Bonnie’s utter dislike and anger at Stefan still boggles my mind. Enzo was responsible for the death of Stefan’s niece. He killed Stefan’s human gf. He was responsible for reviving Rayna Cruz. He was a vampire that was responsible for the death of many. Damon killed Tyler, and would have killed Jeremy. Them she forgives, but Stefan is dirt? Meh, just more inconvenient inconsistencies.
Kelly and Vicky showed up as Katherine’s proxy to reign terror on MF. Kelly, after giving a hell of a toast is back to hell whilst Vicky rung that damn bell. MF is gonna go to hell y’all. Bonnie is down, though not sure if she’s dead. Stefan–the human–is the only one by her side. The vamps conveniently forgot they have vamp speed I suppose.
There were so many problems with this episode, not the least of which is that, though there seemed to be the aim, there was absolutely no suspense or urgency. Visits from Kelly and Vicky didn’t add a lick of excitement to the story.
Predictions for the final episode have anything from Stefan dying and Delena riding off into the sunset to everyone going to hell. The latter is one of my prediction at least–or maybe it’s a wish. But maybe Damon and Caroline will come to realize that Elena can only have kids with Stefan. They’ll all live together in a big, big, boarding house with the kids. Or, or, maybe Caroline will leave Stefan and Damon will leave Elena. Er, nope, won’t happen, right?
45 mins to go…